So, if you follow me on facebook, instagram, or twitter you may have noticed that I am on a little road-trip!
A few people have been like, “Where the eff are you?” and “What exactly are you doing?” lol Well, I am road tripping to see friends in/around Austin, TX this week and I am on Vacay!
Yay!
It’s so important for me and my massive case of wanderlust, to get out of town when I start to feel that itch in my bones to go see the world.
Traveling, as y’all know, is part of what makes me, me. A life full of travel = a life I love. It keeps me from feeling stale, boxed-in, and bored. It’s like my lifeblood. (more…)
Twenty-ish people have asked me every day since I returned, if I went to San Francisco alone. When I say yes, people look really shocked/confused sort of like. something must be wrong with me and definitely like I could have died on such an trip. They then ask, “WHY?!”
This is my answer in blog-form 🙂
I often say in my blogs and to my coaching clients that one of the most important steps to getting what you want in life, is being super clear on what you want. This step has served me numerous times in my personal and professional life as I endeavor to create the life of my dreams.
However, once you are clear on what you want, there is another crucial step: you have to show up for the life you want – like every day. That means making a daily commitment to the decisions that will ultimately serve you and get you to where you are going.
The obstacles that come up in our lives are simply assignments. Having obstacles is not a sign that you are doing something wrong. They show up to teach us, test us, and help us get to where we are going. The emotions, thoughts, and actions that arise in us in response to our obstacles often let us know where we have work to do. As the New Year has rolled around and I’m endeavoring (as always) to create my best year yet, I’ve noticed that my daily showing up is not always easy. Certain crazy-town thoughts can get in my way.
Showing up for yourself (or rising to the occasion) can mean a lot of different things. It sometimes means saying yes to the thing you aren’t sure you know how to do. It means being willing to be in temporary discomfort or uncertainty while you put yourself out there. It means continually stepping up your game. It means not giving up when you aren’t sure you see your progress. It means looking your fear in the face and telling it to eff off. It means taking good enough care of your body that you feel well enough to do the things you are called to do. It means making the hard decision when doubt is screaming in your face. It means being honest about the kind of life you want and then creating that life.
If you’ve known me very long, you know I love quotes! I love to read them, find them, make my own and share them everywhere. If you follow me on my Facebook Page, Fanpage, or Twitter you make have noticed my daily quotes that post each day at 11:11 am CST. Since we all need a little a little extra inspiration in life, I’ve decided to start sharing them here too! This particular week, they are all by me and inspired by my life. Enjoy!
[Tweet “Give yourself permission to enjoy your life today. – @XoAmandaFrances”]
I know it seems like a Monday, but it’s actually just an opportunity for a really awesome day. – Amanda Frances
[Tweet “Bitter doesn’t look good on anyone. – @XoAmandaFrances”]
I don’t play the wait-around game. If someone isn’t making you a priority, that’s okay. Just go do your own thing. – Amanda Frances
[Tweet “Be willing to let other people have a bad day. It’s not about you. – @XoAmandaFrances”]
Where your heart leads is the place you want to be. Where you heart leads you, you have what it takes to do it. – Amanda Frances
[Tweet “When an adventure presents itself always say “Yes!” – @XoAmandaFrances”]
Let’s talk about Destiny. I know I know. I want to talk about this every blog, but it’s totally on my mind right now. There is something very special to me about traveling and I get uber excited each time. I get especially excited when I feel as though forces of the universe are behind me as I set out to see the big wide world.
So last week I randomly decided to stop by Barnes and Noble with a little girl I work with because it was to cold to go to go to the park. I was browsing books a little before we left and kept noticing a brightly colored book with a cute girl standing in a way that seemed to stay “I’m-ready-to-take-on-the-world” called Spirit Junkie. The cute girl in Louboutins is Gabrielle Bernstein who I now love. I eventually gave in, picked up the book and read a little of chapter one. Gabby wrote the book on reflection on the concepts in a book called A Course in Miracles. She also references a book called Return to Love by Marianne Williamson. Marianne also wrote a book from her interpretations from A Course. So basically I found myself at B&N reading, on Amazon buying, and on my couch loving these books this week.
To give you a little tid-bit about it, A Course was written in the 70’s from a Christian perspective and uses Jesus-y language. It is heavy and dense, however, and takes mucho time to read. Marianne wrote her book in the 90’s – she is from a different generation and uses some New Age-y language to explain the concepts. Gabby writes from an energetic and youthful places. She uses a lot of meditation and has kind of a Buddha-y take on the Course. For me, studying spiritual concepts is a hobby and passion – so I’m loving the different perspectives. In case your wondering, I don’t believe that any person, perspective, or religion has a monopoly on things of the spirit – so the varying views don’t offend me – I think they are wonderful.
The books have helped me realize so many ways I have been holding myself back with fear and dread. Most of what I worry about isn’t things that are actual problems, but my perceptions of things that are/could be problems. Our fears are usually deeply rooted and have been reining for years. The problem I sometimes have is projecting disappointments of the past into fears of the future. Since our perceptions make our reality, a false belief can really get you hung up on something rather currently meaningless. It’s important to acknowledge these beliefs and let them go. These books help one shift perspectives and choose love and happiness over fear and doubt. Wonderful, marvelous work. I recommend these books to everyone ever, as long as your willing to open your mind. And as always, I will take the things I am learning in life and turn them in to BLOGS – woot woot!
I believe each opportunity to question, learn, and grow is a beautiful thing. I am so blessed to share my journey with you.:)
So anyway, the fateful travel moment came when I called my homegirl Katie Hoffman and said, “Hey friend. I land in New York Friday afternoon what do you want to do before we go out?” and she said, “I want to go see Gabrielle Bernstein speak.” Umm… I had no idea Katie read her books too! What are the chances that I’d start reading this book, start to love it to death and then the next thing I know have an opportunity to go see her in NYC the day I land?! Especially since I changed the reservation last-minute to this random week in January. Slim to none. Love it.
SO excited for NYC! So I have my tri-pod, camera, laptop with me and will be sure to keep you posted from Manhattan! Love you! Love it!
Now for a few other life-changing moments. . .
Favorite Snack
(or, on somedays, breakfast, lunch or dinner)
It isn’t the healthiest snack ever or anything, but depending on how you have it, it definitely isn’t bad. I love to load my Pink Berry up with all the fruit they have. Ask for it upside down and they will put all the yummy in the bottom. What a lovely way to get some fruit in your day. A little piece of LA in your mouth.
Favorite Night Out
My friend Garrett and I hit up Dallas the other night going to places that we super lively, drinking drinks that were very potent, and only talking about things that made us laugh hysterically or think deeply. (I love to be deep) My kind of night. We visited a crowded local pub for dinner: Neighborhood Services Tavern followed by a hot new spot with a fantastic second story bar for an after dinner drink: Delfriscos Grill. Check it out if you find your cute self in Dallas this year. 🙂
Also, I have to mention that I met a girl with my identical top-knot. She said she liked mine better because it looked more like Lauren Conrad’s. I hugged her – It’s inspired by the one and only. To make create my high bun/top knot click here.
Favorite Work-Out Moment
There is something extra special about my favorite jogging spot in my hometown of Tulsa. The sun was warm, but the air crisp and cool. The sky was clear, the river full, and I was happily strategizing for the New Year. It was the kind of day that when mixed with the endorphins that come from a good run, can make you feel like you could do absolutely anything. (ps: you can.)
Favorite Caffination Moment
Okay so it’s not really my favorite way. There is no such thing as a favorite when it comes to my coffee. I love it all. However, I do love to order my Starbucks “For-Here” They put it in a pretty class cup revealing your caramel drizzle, chocolate shavings, and other goodness. Amen to that.
There is something so nice about holding a warm cup of pretty coffee on a cold day. And since I fail miserably a making my own, this totally works. Also, you save 10 cents per drink for using the enviro-friendly glass cup. Amen and amen. This was taken at the bux near Cole and Knox in Dallas.
Favorite Outfit
So this dress was initially ordered to be a NYE dress (my favorite holiday ever). However, when I ended up going to a Black Tie Optional event I decided to wear a ball gown. This was obviously a smart decision as any opportunity to dress more like a princess usually is. 😉 Anyway, I had it with me on my trip so I decided to dress it down for day-time. I love how a short cocktail dress can work for day when paired with boots a blazer. I’m thinking it would also be cute with black tights and booties with my tan blazer. 🙂 🙂 Outfit inspiration is so fun.
Enjoy your weekend. And remember why it is we celebrate this Monday. Equality for all. Amen and amen.
As some of you know, I got out of a very icky situation just over 4 years ago that I consider to be a cult. When I left, I was afraid, really really really afraid. I was conditioned to believe that I needed to be in that group to function spiritually, to be on the right path, and to fulfill whatever it was that I was intended to do with my life.
We were told that God wouldn’t do anything with our lives until we helped the pastor of this church do something with his. Which was, of course, a big fat lie.
When I left, I was a stifled, confused, beat-down, defeated version of myself. All the things that make me, me were considered insignificant and unnecessary in this abusive, controlling pseudo-church.
Sometimes in life, it seems that right when you can’t possible take it anymore, you find what you need. Within a few days of leaving the place I was so unhappy in, I finally heard the message that I so desperately needed. A teacher, friend, philosopher, or family member couldn’t have spoken it to me in a way I could have received – I had lived in a world where only spiritual things mattered, and I didn’t trust people on the outside. As is always always true for me, it seems to me that the universe and all that’s divine knew what I needed and sent me someone who I would listen to. He was a minister from my denomination, working in the town I had run-away to, who spoke a religious language that I was familiar with at the time, yet filled the gaps of passages with love, not control and narcissism.
Even when you are lost and hopeless, destiny can still find you.
I’ll never forget the words he said to me, “Amanda, what do you love? The things you love are the things God has called you to do. The most successful people I know are doing what they love. Find a way to make what you love, what you do.”
My confidence had been destroyed. My sense of self was barely breathing. I didn’t know where to go next, but someone I felt I could trust, gave me permission to start dreaming.
And I did.
And I haven’t stopped.
I started with what I knew I loved. These were all things that had been considered needless and petty in the cult, but I decided that they were my passions for a purpose, and slowly I have learned to embrace all of who I am. I knew I loved psychology and helping people. I knew I wanted a PhD. I knew I longed to see the world. I knew I was an extrovert to the core. I knew I was enamored with makeup and aesthetically pleasing fashion and designs. So I applied to school, began studying French (which I never learned but I did, however, learn tons about European culture), learned to trust and make friends, I started dressing how I wanted, and I began surrounding myself with beautiful things. (Life isn’t always beautiful so I eventually learned to find the pretty in the ugly, but that’s a totally different blog post.)
Eight countries, almost two degrees, lots of friends, and the creation of a blog and business later, I have made the things I love, my life.
I am chasing my dreams.
I get to contribute to the world by doing the things I love, every day.
Is there something that you partake in that seems to cause time to escape you? Notice that. Is there something you are a part of that whether it completely stresses you out or not, you love every minute of it? Notice that. What section do you find yourself in at a book store? How do you feel when you read those books? Notice that. What websites do you frequent when you’re procrastinating? Notice that. What do you catch yourself talking about when a conversation wanders? Notice that. Is there an area that when you write, talk, or think about it, you light up? Notice that.
I’m not saying that you will find this tangible thing that is your purpose, next day start a company, and the next day be a millionaire. It is more of a process.
Each little “ah-ha” moment leads us closer to understanding what our purpose is.
As Oprah says, you get closer as you “feed the heart of that which you love.”
I am slowly finding ways to make the things I love, my whole entire life. So now, I have a life I love.
No one can tell you what your purpose is, but you have one and I believe you will find it – if you just look and believe.
You have a contribution to make to the world. Only you and that which you consider Divine can define it. Let it be as unique as you are.
Your heart is speaking all the time. It’s your job to listen to it.
Never stop believing. Remove yourself from hateful people. Follow your inner voice. Believe.
