SO happy to be back this week for another tip for designing a life and business that you are BEYOND completely wildly obsessed with.
OMG!!! TODAY’S VIDEO!!!! I recorded it EXACTLY one year ago, tomorrow.
BACKGROUND: I was visiting Portland, Oregon for the weekend.
I had been in my PhD program for one year. I was enrolled at the school that was considered the best of the best for my field.
Everything had gone exactly according to plan, but I didn’t like the plan anymore.
The dream I had set my heart on more than 10 years earlier did not fit the way my life, vision, and personality had evolved.
But I was SO attached to the old dream. The old dream had moved me to overcome a million challenges and kick ass in my bachelors and masters degrees. Practicums. Internships. I had dealt with so many different types of academic bullshit. I had jumped through so many fire-y hoops. So many tears. So many sleepless night pouring my heart into papers and studying a trillion psychology and counseling related things. So many administrators and jerk-faces who only saw things one way. I had given everything for this dream to come true, how the hell could I admit that I no longer wanted it? How could I give it up?
I was out of alignment. I was incongruent. I was a hot mess.
I hated going to school. I hated writing papers. I hated following a model that didn’t allow for me to fully give my gifts when working with clients.
I was tired of hiding from everyone at school that I was a life-coach with a growing business.
Nothing fit my heart.
And the new dream wouldn’t stop talking to me.
The dream of going big online and helping woman all over the world learn to make money, help others, and take control of their lives… I felt that dream brewing inside of me. I felt that dream calling me home every single day. I heard their cries. I knew I was needed.
I knew I had to follow my heart. And do what I loved most. And honor myself. And honor the way that my heart’s desires had evolved.
And I was scared-to-fucking-death.
So here I was in Portland, Oregon. I thought that maybe the old dream and the new dream could be friends if I could just find a different PhD program. When I recorded this video, I had just interviewed at an awesome school — with way more flexible hours, a make-your-own schedule, very non-academic environment, and instructors who thought it was SO cool that I was a life coach. Everyone there was 100% great with me running my business and dedicating a day or two a week to their program. And they wanted to take ALL my credits from my current program.
I was like, “OMG. If I am going to get a PhD, THIS is the way to do it.”
And shortly after I recorded this vlog, I got in. And I got an email with a schedule attached. And a beautiful welcome letter. And right away I thought about how the two days a week I would spend working on things for that program instead of growing my business. I started dreading the new PhD program starting before I had told anyone at the old PhD program that I was leaving.
The old dream in a new form, was not going to cut it.
I declined their offer.
It was scary at first. Leaving the first PhD program meant giving up the money from my stipend. Saying no to both programs meant giving up a shot at ever being a professor or doing loads of other things that the old dream encompassed. A lot of old dreams were never going to be able to come true if I left. And I would have to figure out how to make more money in my coaching business right away to make up for the money I was making from being in the program (the process I created for confronting these money fears actually became the Money Mentality Makeover course, ps.)
But it didn’t matter. I loved myself too much. I loved the future business that was about to explode out of me too much. I loved the people who I felt were waiting on me too much.
And here we are. In one year my life has evolved into an existence that I could not have imagined before I quit the program. The income. The influence. The love affair I have with my business.
I am so obsessed with my life. The friends I have made. The women I have been honored to teach. The clients who have entrusted their growth to me.
I am living my dreams.
And what’s really crazy is that if I had not quit the old dream, right now I would be two years into the program, with THREE years left and I would still be dreaming of the day that I went big online and let the world know that I was ready to share my true gifts and callings.
Only you can be the one to decide that you are tired of just dreaming the dream and ready to live the dream instead.
Only you can take that next right step or inspired action.
Only you can break the lease, quit the program, sign the papers, or move-the-fuck-on in your own beautiful way.
No one is going to come and save you, but you can save yourself.
And to be perfectly honest with you, I knew the baby business that I had started a few years before was my destiny. I knew it the very second that I bought the domain name and declared myself open for business. I knew it when I faked my way through the interview processes for both PhD programs. I knew it when I accepted the first schools offer. I knew it when I drove to class that first day. And I didn’t listen. I over-rode my heart.
And with that in mind, let me tell you this solid truth: You already know what to do.
Now, you just have to do it.
When new dreams are trying to take form, they need you to MAKE SPACE. This is why people often get fired from jobs when they pray for guidance in finding their life’s purpose or why a ton of my life coaching clients wrapped up their work right before it was time for me to start focusing on online courses and business coaching. A good friend of mine who does social media marketing for companies, but really wants to be life coaching full time, had her biggest social media client decide not to renew right before a new life-coaching client showed up. My friend was able to sell her first five figure coaching packages because of this. Dreams need space my loves. Make room.
If you have any questions, leave them in the comments below! I will be answering them throughout the week
This is my MOST watched vlog with 4,646 view on YouTube! One Year Ago: Why I Quit My PhD Program.
To your big U-Turn moment,
ps: Decisions like this are supposed to be scary. Do it anyway.
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